Wednesday, 19 January 2011

Road rage- addendum

Still on that road rage theme here's an old Disney clip on the same

Tuesday, 18 January 2011

The Overlap and other stories from Kenya

We all know them those people who think they're geniuses on the road... Then again don't we all. Words which I heard a long time ago and have never left my mind is 'everybody no matter who they are considers themselves an above average driver' - me included! :) Anyway I'm not here to blow my own trumpet about how I epitomize sane and courteous driving I've discovered that on Kenyan roads you have to have a bit of bite lest you're pushed around we've heard of defensive driving here it's more like attacking driving! Naturally the biggest culprits of tomfoolery and all kinds of roguish behaviour on the roads are the infamous matatu crewa and for those who've been around Mt. Kenya my miraa carrying Mbrathas (sic)

Before I sart digressing too much let me get to the main point of this post- this phenomenon known as 'overlapping'. I read some guys on twitter complain how it has become such a common occurence nowadays, the norm rather than the exception as opposed to a few years back when it was vice versa. I'd tend to agree with that, it;s really annoing and has taken some new dimensions. Nowadays even when you wait for a car in front of you turn at a junction it's become pretty much normal for other cars to overtake you on the other side. A few years ago I never used to see this, Matatu culture has really crept into our everyday life. Just yesterday somebody had the audacity to hoot at me as I waited for the car in front to turn as he was on the 'overlap'. Today again a matatu guy was overlapping me and that really ticked me off didn't even let him have a chance to get back into the road. You may say that's extreme but seriously sometimes you just have to stand up to these clowns hence my previous assertion about having some bite.

In my humble opinion the road- that thing with bitumen and markings is where cars should be! I guess that's pretty much common sense unless you bought your driving licence! the shoulders- hard, soft, whatever they may be are not for cars, neither are sidewalks! those are are for pedestrians, cyclists, farm animals, martians and whatever else not for you to use in your imaptience- I wonder if we are in such a hurry on the roads why are we late most of the times. So next time you feel tempted to use the side of the road please consider the rest of us insane people who are kind to our cars suspensions and stick to the road! Sometimes I wish I could just get a sack of nails an pour them on the side of the road!

Silly antics are not confined to the above phenomenon. Another silly and in my opinion totally pointless habit is hooting when the lights go green. Pointless because anybody behind the wheel of a car knows what a green light means and so what are you warning them about with your horn? Sorry unlike you our cars don't have instant acceleration from a complete stop.

Now on to my pet peeve. The most basic rule of all which everybody is taught in driving school- What is the rule of the road in Kenya? keep left! Now now if I had a shilling for every time I met a fully laden track hobbling down the right lane of a dual carriageway at 30 km/h showing no signs of turning right at the next exit... Same holds for slow drivers on the inside lane. Our good friends at the automobile association have done us the good favour of putting up signs to remind us of this. So no snide comments or rants this time, just a simple request- I beg, I beg oh! Please, please, please, unless you're overtaking or turning right at the next junction keep left- will go along way in aiding smooth traffic flow on the dual carriageway.

Driving does not require you to be a genius, just a little courtesy and consideration will go a long way and if you want to get there on time so does everybody else, you're not more special! So next time you get the urge to join the cattle on the side of the road- don't.

If you see any bad driving don't hesitate to post it at

Now what are your pet peeves on the road?

Friday, 14 January 2011

I met God

It was a Sunday morning like any other
Got myself out of home and to church
where I was to meet my God

I sung great songs
lifted my hands in the air seeking his presence
I prayed fervently, I heard the word
soon it was time to for me to go back home

Little did I know He would be out there
waiting for me
Not quite what I expected you know

Was about five feet tall
Kind of shaggy looking fellow

His clothes not the latest fashions

He stood there as the masses passed
hand stretched out
Asking 'ninunulie chakula' *

And that is how I met God
on a Sunday that I thought was like any other
Matthew 25:40...

* kiswahili for 'buy me food'