2. Listen

We were given two ears and one mouth so that we listen twice as much as we talk. Another old saying full of wisdom. Listening is hard at times but before we go all out and express our opinions take some time to listen to what the other person is saying. That goes a long way as everybody appreciates being listened to, Ir's very easy to judge somebody but before you do take a minute to listen to where they're coming from

1. Honesty is the best policy

An old saying that still holds true. Lies may get you out of trouble initially but in the end you'll be in more trouble when the truth is found out. It is best to tell the truth at all times to save you from problems later.

Nipe Nyahunyo!

We are at it again folks! My pet peeve, the topic that's always sure to get me worked up and spewing vitriol... Our lovely Kenyan roads with their 'well diciplined' and 'courteous' drivers, quite a peachy lot they are -NOT! What comes to mind is the old Kiswahili saying "Akili Nyingi huondoa maarifa" loosely translated as if you try to be too clever you end up becoming foolish. Let me explain vis a vis this  'overlapping' disease that has reached epidemic proportions on our roads. first a couple of examples.


This past weekend I was on Thika road( should be called Thicker road) on both Saturday evening and Sunday afternoon. On Saturday night was around the old Castle brewery heading towards Nairobiand had the pleasure of spending almost an hour there. It got so bad that I turned off the engine stepped out and started calling people and one of them told me that people stay there till 11 on average. . Only one side of the road is open and they've put stones to separate Nairobi bound and Thika bound traffic. However there's no red ribbon or signage to help people. During the day there are workers but at night there's nobody with a clue. Now this clueless state is probably what led to the following events.


The two lanes on either side should have been been sufficient but some geniuses on either side decided to occupy all four lanes and a gridlock ensued with nobody moving. What made matters worse is others who perceived that they had even greater intellectual capacity i.e  overlappers came into play with no less than four lanes of traffic on the side of the road.I decided I was not laughing with people and did not yield an inch to them, was basically on the bumper of the car ahead of me. If  I hadn't done that would have spent way more time on that road.


Similar story on Sunday afternoon. The good students at Kenyatta University decided to unleash their fury on unsuspecting motorists and the road was blocked. Lucky for me I was given advance warning and used the bypass. However I was not the only one and near Thome estate there was a big build up thanks to people avoiding Thika road trying to get on the road. nobody was willing to give way and yet again both sides of the road were blocked. Same script different cast and MENSA Kenya chapter were on the sides of the road as usual. Wasted an extra 30 mins trying to get out of it.


While sitting there I was really thinking if somebody would give me a whip I'd go out there and administer some corporal punishment on people. There are these ads that they show on TV about 'Ushenzi' i.e foolishness and that's exactly what such behaviour is. Blocking traffic moving in the other direction or trying to come in from outside the road only makes things worse, you won't get where you're going any faster just be patient and stay in line and eventually things will move albeit slowly which is better than a complete standstill! So please if you're reading this and get tempted to so something silly out there don't. If you're overlapping as Francis Atwoli would say "wewe ni Mshenzi!" " yes!"


Now where's that whip...

Another one for the Great Scot

Now I revisit a subject that I've covered before here . The one and only Sir Alex Ferguson, manager of the greatest football club in the world Manchester United! This past weekend he celebrated the major milestone of 25 years in charge, no mean feat in these days of managerial jobs being like a revolving door.  
The only Manager who has survived at one club since the inception of the FA Premier League and of course the one who has won the most titles at 12 so far and this year finally broke the Liverpool record of league titles with their 19th. The next challenge I guess would be beating Liverpool's European titles.

Some may ask what's the big deal? First it's rare in this age of modern football with impatient boards and mega-rich owners for a manager to keep his job for long. Also he's an old school manager who has authority over his team even if they earn hundreds of thousands of pounds per week and he has shown he can let them go no matter how talented they are or think they are. However on thing that has stood out over his reign is how he keeps reinventing the team when new challenges come up. In the nineties he saw off Blackburn with their galaxy of stars and after that Arsenal with their french army assembled by Arsene Wenger. Even when Abramovich arrived with his billions at Chelsea their run didn't last too long and Fergie was back in 2007-2009 to grab a hat-trick of titles. Now what remains to be seen is if he can deal with the 'noisy neighbours' Manchester City who are running riot in the league this season. Granted now with other rich clubs their power in the transfer market has been diminished and they can't always afford the top players as in years gone by. We'll see what the new bunch of youngsters can do.

To illustrate his longevity on the job I remember as a child in the late 80s watching the 'Road to Wembley' coverage of the FA cup which used to  air on KBC (Kenya Broadcasting Corporation) - then VOK (Voice of Kenya). One night Manchester United were playing Sheffield United and I was rooting for United and when they lost I cried! Amazing that even then Ferguson was still the manager!

So here's to the Great Scot and long may he continue to deliver more great football and titles!

It came in a ship

A common saying in Kenya is "kizungu kilikuja na meli" loosely translated to mean that English came in a ship hence our struggles with it. Having grown up in a house where both parents at were at one time teachers has made me learn the finer details of the language by default. I remember as child when I'd go home and use some of the colloquialisms I learnt in school my parents would be quick to correct me. After all they were in school during the colonial days so were taught by native speakers. In high school too our director who was Kenyan by birth but English by descent also took the liberty to teach us a few things about the English language especially about pronunciation. I'll never forget how to pronounce Goliath correctly. With this background it is no surprise that once in a while I find myself in the 'grammar Nazi category' Now let's have a few examples of some words and phrases that are not very well used particularly in the press where they have achieved cliche status.

Let us begin with a little nugget I learnt from Dr Griffin. Last week we lost a great Kenyan in Professor Wangari Maathai and to mourn her death the president ordered the flag to be flown at half mast. Now at first glance you'd think that half mast means hoisting the flag halfway up the post but I came to learn from the good old director that what that actually means is the flag is flown the width of the flag below the top. Interesting that, not so much about grammar but tradition. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half-staff

Another word which I had erroneously thought meant something else is one which is very often quoted in the media is impunity. They're always talking about ending the culture of impunity etc. At some point it had started being used all over the place like when matatus raise fares that's impunity or when the cabinet decided to amend the constitution to suit their own ends they were accused of impunity. I had come to be leave that the word meant disregard or 'madharau' in kiswahili. However one day I consulted the 'msema kweli' (the one who speaks the truth) and looked it up in the dictionary and found out the real meaning of the word to be as follows... courtesy of http://www.thefreedictionary.com/impunity
Impunity -Exemption from punishment, penalty, or harm.

Also when somebody does something without regard for the consequences they are said to do so 'with impunity'. So for example saying that the Hague would end impunity in Kenya would be correct as the accused face consequences which they would otherwise have not. However in the case of constitution amendments it sounds out of place as there is no punishment involved there... that could be up for debate as there could be other unwelcome consequences.

We move on to another word which is a pet peeve for me due to it's common misuse. The word epitome. Some have used it to mean the height of something e.g "he has reached the epitome" yet in actual fact it means that which characterizes something or in other words the quintessence, a perfect example. http://www.thefreedictionary.com/epitome. It sounds more to describe a state than a place where somebody gets.

Another nugget which I found out was the real meaning of dowry. When people go to discuss what they'll give the family of the bride before a wedding we usually call that dowry negotiations while the actual fact is that in our culture here in Kenya what we're really negotiation is the bride price. Technically dowry is what the bride brings into the marriage not what you give her parents. Wikipedia explains it excellently here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dowry . Was surprised when I found that out. Nowadays when I come across a word I'm not sure about always make an effort to look it up in the dictionary, bet I'll get more surprises along the way.

There are also other little things that my parents always pick up on TV or in speech, I'll call them Kenyanisms. Phrases like "I was bought for" starting sentences with double pronouns"me I", "us we", "them they" come up pretty often. Oh and written language exposes even more grammatical and spelling errors. 

What other common Kenyanisms can you think of that will awaken the Grammar Nazis among us?

Who Am I?

That's just the question of questions isn't it? Self definition, when you can reach that place when you can describe exactly who you are.

The idea for this post came up when I was talking with my parents and they were talking about how people define themselves by their careers especially the prestigious ones. When introducing themselves they say I'm so and so and I'm a Doctor, Lawyer, Engineer etc. Then they were like that's what you DO but is exactly what you ARE? A career is what you do for a few hours a day but who you are encompasses way more than that, what you think about, what you dream about when you sleep, what you talk about most. Describing one self is not so easy as saying as what you do 9-5 Monday to Friday. I fond this particular definition interesting because professionally I can describe myself in two different ways, maybe even three yet I'm not actively engaged in any as a career so it would be restrictive to use any as a definition.

In life we have so many frames of references which we use to describe ourselves. I gave the example of career but what else could it be?

When we are children you're somebody's son/daughter.
In School we are identified by the school we attend, the more prestigious it is the more proud we are
When working it's the company we work for, the chosen career.
When Married you introduce yourself as somebody's husband or wife.
When you have children you become Baba nani or Mama nani
The list goes on and on, we use our environment to describe who we are yet what matters most is who we are within.

Self actualization and a search for purpose are the highest pursuits in human life and I can bet there's nothing better than knowing exactly who you are and what you are here for and to stand up and say I am _ and not restrict yourself to the above definitions but speak from a position of authority. So when I meet people who are so passionate about a cause and know that's what their calling is I'm really moved and go like "When I grow up I want to be like him/her"

In the good book Jesus Christ asks a similar question to one of his disciples - Luke 9:18 but He had already demonstrated time and time again He knew who He was, not just a carpenter as they would have defined Him using his profession.

Was reminded of these thoughts when I read this note Which reminds us that God as our maker knows who we are as our maker and if we are to get these answers the first place to look is up to Him for answers. So for all my fellow hunters- yet to get and answer happy hunting, go to the manufacturer for more information.


I sign off with this beautiful song by Casting crowns

Waxing Philosophical!- a totally pointless post or almost

An idle mind is the devil's workshop goes the old saying, right now there's deafening sounds coming from the said workshop like he's hammering a karai or something like those guys at Gikomba...

A while back I noticed an interesting status update on Facebook that went like this "How come nobody ever says "everything happens for a reason" after something good happens?" Major point made right there! When was the last time when somebody got a new job, promotion or other great achievement talk like that? I can picture it it now after a guy gets a spanking new Mercedes Benz his pal comes by and tells him "everything happens for a reason" Chances of that happening are next to nil! It's only when we're disappointed or something doesn't go your way that all of a sudden you become philosophical. That's probably the case due to a need for hope that we all have that one day things will get better. So question is success doesn't happen for a reason too?

Another area where philosophizing is common is in the area of relationships. I can bet top dollar whenever I hear somebody complain about the way men/women are or come up with theories the person is single or if not unhappy if they're in a relationship. People in love just walk around starry eyed like their feet are on clouds... Find it funny when somebody gets hooked up and starts asking the single people why aren't you dating- like they forgot the time when they were single... haha life is interesting.

Another philosophical time is when death comes knocking close by and reminds us of our mortality. It may be months or years since you lost a close or loved one but when it happens the perceived immortality that we have in our youth disappears and you realise it could happen to anybody. Well this is one thing we can not escape but it shouldn't lead us to fear but to strengthen our resolve to live full lives in the limited time we have- oops here I go getting all philosophical on y'all but the truth is you only get...

Yep you guessed it- the grim reaper has swung his scythe nearby. However this time I celebrate a young life that was nipped in the bud, one who in the short time I knew her was a woman full of life, full of talent and full of laughter too. One who truly lived up to her name sweetie and brought so much laughter into our lives and lives on in her little daughter's life. Death is so cruel but we who remain live on. R.I.P Faith Nancy Kilinda.

Also sincere condolences to all who lost loved ones in the Sinai fire. Even as we mourn may we learn

Now now my philosophies begin to grow thin so let me get back to my armchair cynicism with my fellow talkers...